M'Paradise

Ive got a lot of cuts and bruises lately,  Which most of the time, i ignore them thinking that it will heal fast.  But everytime they come to contact with any other things that create friction, the pain is no joke. My skin turns darker.  In our lives, we have been committing sins that apparent small  to us and hence we ignored them. Thinking as time pass by, the “small sins” would fade in ocean of our good deeds. As if. But little did we realize, everytime each sin meets another sin they dont fade away easily. They create a dark impact in our hearts. And that heart, is indescribably sick.

We never know what will happen. "Will i be okay?" "Am i doing the right thing?" The heavier the reponsibility, the more limited one knowledge has become — That is what i believe. I know i cannot grasp all at once, let it alone with my "cat-paws" and i know, time doesnt have mercy on people.  Shall i be greedy in the name of knowledge-seeking or shall i wait for the time to pass believing that by time, everything will be at its rightfull place? Looking back at old photos of the late chosen ones, I feel like wishing I was there with them. During the bright sunny days.  But then probably in that time, I wouldnt feel like I am a part of something big like how it is now. I am a part of something big, something that once was successful but now I have to start from scratch to get it back to where it was once or perhaps higher. No I am not confused. It is just not the right time for me to know. I am a bit scared but I